Random...

Another random entry... erm... let mi recollect wat's happening nowadays... oh... after celebrating my bday, the next bday celebration is ah ting's 22nd bday lor.. qiang, tatong, samuel, gen, gen's friend were present... haha.. again went for drink... but this time quite ok... we only opened one bottle... erm, wana said again to ah ting, sorry tat we all were late tat day.. haha... but i noe u'll forgive us de right?? wahaha... well, just a short celebration tat day & it's the shortest chiong session we ever had... we actually managed to catch the last train (see how early we left tat day) haha.... gen with her friend & also samuel left early... so left we four siao de.. haha.. took the last train, the train as though only we all like tat... we siao de lor took many siao siao pics (nt for uploading.. haha.. cos most of the pics nt so nice) Suppose wana go bedok 85 for supper, in the end nv... reached hm like ard 12plus to 1am... was still raining... raining whole day tat day...
Erm.. then the past 1 wk... super busy with work... so so tired... cos last wk supervisor on leave... haiz... work seems nv end... table now still in a mess... dunnoe how... sian... arrrh.... emails so many unread.. work so many undone... jialat... :(
Sat suppose planned to meet ah gen out lor.. celebrate her bday in advance... just for dinner, but this gal so so busy de lor... wan to meet her also difficult ar... so called off the meeting... then thought of meeting ah ting go parkway, but in the end both lazy to go out... haha... so stayed hm watched videos & vcds...
Sunday meet jo lor... went library.. lolx.. erm.. she wana research for taiwan stuff lor... i tink she really too excited liao la... i told her, i dun tink we need too many info lor... most of the places i went tat time, we can go there cos i still can recall how to go... no worries.. haha... but she really power lor.. did so much research by herself... went her hse after tat saw all the research i almost faint... lolx... b4 went her place, we went have early dinner at the japanese restaurant beside tampines swimming pool... had sushi all tat... eat till we so full... haha... we very jialat la.. gt our pay then spend like tat... Was in the library when tatong called to jio go for a drink in the evening... called ah ting see she free nt, but she was helping her cousin with project... so i going alone to meet up with them lor... after tat they changed plan said go bedok 85 eat.. so rush down there meet them lor... they talk their stuff, i just keep eating.. lolx... thought i should be full de after eating the sushi all tat, but i still eat... haha... getting more & more fat liao... :( Eat until almost 10pm then walked to the bus stop take bus back hm...
Just some words regarding tat same old matter again... erm... i sense u feel uneasy, so do i... dun worry tat i'll do or said anything to u anymore... nothing will happen starting from the day i said i'm giving up... cos i've done wat i can, said wat i wana said le... it's enough, enough till i hate myself so much... i just wish tat the next time we see each other tat weird feeling will not exist anymore...
Haha... i so siao... so wat if i wrote so much things regarding tat matter here... he won't see also.. nvm.. at least i said out wat i tink...
I tink jo brainwash mi alot... haha... She scolded mi, saying why must i always bother by tat matter... i did try doing watever i can le, nt said i didn't, at least i've no regret... Ya, tink she's right ba... :)
Alright, gona stop here... going slp... i wan to have sweet dreams.. haha... had nt been sleeping well these few days...

One Last Try....

Always telling myself i must stop being upset abt my life... upset having this kind of life which i nv choose to have & nv wan to have... Was talking to jo on the phone tat day... i told her, there's so much things inside my mind & heart which i really dunnoe who i can talk to... She noe the changes of my life ever since it happened during sec sch times... Many pple kept telling mi, i've to go thru all these unhappy & upset times first, so that next time it will be better for mi... Ya, i believe it'll get better as time passes... tat's y i've been trying nt to tink abt all these... trying really hard... but, it had been more than 7 or 8 years le... i dunnoe how many more years i've to go thru somemore... everytime when i dun tink abt this, i thought things can get better... but the more i hope it can get better, the more problems i get... dunnoe y this kept happening... it really make mi feel so tired...
Jo talked to mi alot tat day... she said even though i have so much unhappiness & upsets, but i should also tink tat in this period i also gain alot of things... things which some other pple dun get... she said at least i still have a complete family, though gt many problems, i have many friends ard mi, i have a job tat can help to support myself & family and i've many many other things... these are the things which i should be happy abt... now it's just a test for mi... as long as i overcome this test, everything will come smooth to mi le...
Ya, i do agreed with her... i really tink i always kept tinking of the worst and kept hoping... I can be happy de... it's the matter of when i'm prepare to step out to be happy & forget abt the unhappy & upsets things...
Yes, from now on... i'm nt going to waste my time on anything tat will cause mi to be upsets... i'll accept watever tat stops mi from being happy... this is the last try i'll do...
As for the other matter tat have upset mi for the past 4-5 years... i'm really giving up le... Like wat i always said, i'm very silly... i'm nt going to continue being silly... Pple who dunnoe how to appreciate mi, why must i keep holding on?? It makes mi looks so silly in front of tat person... Tat person won't be happy if i keep holding on... Congrat u're free now... Just a word for u... If u like her, tell her... U nv try to said, she'll nv noe... Good luck to u...
Alright, time to forget everything in the past... Some updates here...
Last sat meet up with ah ting & gen, went shopping... lolx... great s'pore sales mah... haha... gen said she almost dun wana come back to s'pore after shopping at KL... haha... mi too... still have the mood of shopping after coming back from taipei for more than 2 or 3 wks le... haha... erm... told them something which at 1st i didn't wan to said... actually, i'm planning to go taipei again in august... this time with jo alone... using our free ticket... haha... i noe it's abit too much la... less than a few mths... then mi going again... will be going on 08 aug to 11 aug... hoping everything is smooth... been checking the load... suppose going on 09 aug... but load for tat day really bad... to play safe, have to go one day earlier.. so will be 4 days 3 nights... gd enough le... i just wana go to places tat i missed the previous trip... then do more shopping for myself cos tat time i didn't really buy alot of things for myself lor... only kept tinking of buying things for friends & food for colleagues... jo is excited... haha... i'm just excited for shopping & enjoying my leave... lolx... Been telling wen tat nowadays can't concentrate on work... keep tinking of relaxing & enjoying... haha... jialat sia... ok ok... i must concentrate la.. somemore next wk supervisor on leave, must prepare to work hard ar... today already gt so much things to do... stress ar....
Well, but wkends coming... enjoy wkends first... haha...

Thanks Friends!!!

A little update...
First of all, thanks to all friends who are present on 30th May for my bday celebration... Really appreciate it!! Hope that u all have fun & enjoy it... Bu hao yi shi... mi was totally cannot make it after dunnoe how many cups of drinks tat day... guess more or less due to my gastric pain & drink with an empty stomach...
Oh ya... btw, a piece of gd news.. erm.. passed my basic theory at last... lolx... ya, passed it on my bday.. haha.. maybe my bday did bring mi abit of luck ba... :)
Meet friends after the test and have fun till like 3plus or 4am?? Can't really remember... luckily next day is PH... (Photo uploaded...)
Next day, msg friends saying wana treat them eat lor... cos feel paiseh la, tink they really spend alot... so must give them a treat... meet them up and we went bedok 85 to have our dinner...
Then next day, back to work... But during lunch kind of nt feeling so well... sicky feeling... but i tried to tahan lor... till close to off work... left office early tat day... back hm can't take it anymore... rest & rest on the bed... fever starts... These few days, fever came on & off... until ytd afternoon, cannot tahan anymore, went see doctor... temperature 38.5 degree... Have one day MC for today. Took medicine, feel better but at night again fever... took medicine again... today at hm rest whole day... now better liao... tml have to go back work... :(
Silence is golden....